You might have grown up in a small Midwestern town if...

You might have grown up in a small Midwestern town if...

In addition to names and dates on a family tree, family history is about culture and everyday habits. We're usually studying those factors for people who lived in bygone eras, but perhaps we should leave behind an account of our own generation? My hometown newspaper published what I thought was a mostly-accurate, corny-but-cute list describing those of us (Baby Boomers) who grew up in rural communities in the Midwest:
  • You know what knee-high by the Fourth of July means;
  • You know the difference between 'Green' and 'Red' farm machinery, and would fight with your friends on the playground over which was better;
  • You buy Christmas presents at Farm and Fleet or Tractor Supply Co;
  • You hear someone use the terms "oof-dah" or "Holy Buckets" and you won't break into uncontrollable laughter;
  • You or someone you know was a 'Beef Queen' or 'Dairy Princess' at the county fair;
  • You know that 'combine' is a noun;
  • You let your older siblings talk you into putting your tongue on a steel post in the middle of winter or pee on an electric fence;
  • You know that 'creek' rhymes with 'pick';
  • Football schedules, branding calves and weaning, hunting season and harvest are all taken into consideration before wedding dates are set;
  • If the sun is out, it's really windy, and you're getting wet... better get on the upwind side of the livestock;
  • Saturday you go to your local bowling alley;
  • There was at least one kid in your class who had to help milk cows in the morning;
  • You have driven your car on a lake;
  • Every wedding dance you have ever been to has the hokey pokey and the chicken dance;
  • If a road you're driving on has more than 3 curves to a mile, you are nearing or in the Black Hills;
  • Your vocabulary still includes, "Yes, Ma'am" and "No, Sir";
  • The local gas station sells live bait, next to the local jerked beef and homemade jam;
  • At least twice a year some part of your home doubles as a meat processing plant;
  • You understand that brakes on silage trucks are considered a luxury;
  • Bulldoggin' is an event;
  • As the American flag passes, you are on your feet and have removed your hat, your hand is over your heart, or someone behind you gives you a slap on the head as a reminder to do so;
  • You grow up thinking that opening day of deer and pheasant seasons are national holidays;
  • You understand the true meaning to 'snipe' hunting;
  • Pop is the only name used for a soft drink;
  • Your evening meal is supper, not dinner;
  • You use the phrase "Merry Christmas" openly and freely!